After watching ‘Bill and Teds Excellent Adventure’ while waiting for the polls to close on Tuesday Donald Trump has decided that music can bring about world peace, and the music to bring about global harmony is that of the 90’s girl band ‘B*Witched’.
The task was initially offered to the Spice Girls, the Pussycat Dolls and Destiny Child but this prestigious role was refused for ‘personal reasons’ with sources close to Mel C from the Spice Girls state it’s because Trump is a ‘creepy fucker’.
B*Witched jumped at the chance and are looking forward to this new role, it being superior to flipping burgers or appearing as the ‘Fairy Godmother’ in Cinderella at the Wolverhampton Grand Theatre. The foursome have been flown to the USA and will soon begin rehearsing for their roles, Trump believing hits such as ‘C’est la Vie’ and ‘Don’t Blame it on the Weatherman’ will convince ISIS to lay down their weapons and renounce violent jihad.
It is believed that Donald Trump has assigned special roles of Personal Advisors to the twins within the group, Keavy and Edele, who will be tasked with ‘briefing’ him daily.