“Holy Paperclips of Staples Wasp Brain Man, the phones ringing!”

“Zoots! Its the Managing Director, he says a great plot is afoot to make me work!”

“Chivers! What are you going to do?”

“Take it easy my trusty Lemon Hedgehog, take it easy like I always do. There is no need for such horrors like work to befall me, for remember I am protected by an aura of procrastination and a shield of web browsing. No man or woman can breach their mighty defenses and make me earn the wages Im paid!”

“Ipod dingo shoes! If only I had your brains! Then I too could think of devilishly cunning plans resulting in a slightly boring sloth like existence during the working day and fight crime at night.”

“Well if you had my brain you too would have worked out that I dont fight crime at night, I fight grime! Yes the grime that lives in the sink after a meal for it is I that washes the dishes while you sit watching Hollyoaks with tea in hand after a hard days highlighting”.

“Poppy cup pencil carrots! I thought we had a dishwasher, what is that I put my dirty dishes into each day?”

“The daily ramming of your dirty dishes into my mouth is something I dont look forward too and you use way too much washing powder! I suggest you experiment with one cup instead of two”.

“Highlight my testicles and call me Bernard! What is it I pour Fairy Liquid into?”

“The cleansing fluid enema is certainly not the highlight of my day oh trusty Lemon Hedgehog while cranking of my whirligigs doesnt turn me on either”.

“Gulp argh burp somersault, Ive been cranking your whirligigs! I thought the dishwasher was just pleased to see me!”

“Hummm”